Then you should not use ABP. Using ABP comes with some extra responsibilities.
Indeed, ADR should work with ABP, but I’d say your device is not LoRaWAN compliant. Too hard to debug everything that might go wrong then.
Again, just to be sure: you should not reset the frame counters when not also resetting the device. (The device will be rejecting the invalid FCnt values for the downlinks if you don’t reset the device.)
(As an aside: a DevAddr is not a secret, not encrypted in the radio messages, and not unique.)